MOONLIGHT AND DREAMZ

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    Wednesday, February 19, 2020

    Letter to RURU - No 2

    Dear Ruru,

    It was my birthday.


    As I crossed and reached the other side of 50 among all the warmth and love and wishes, I become grateful yet contemplative (as always. Even in my childhood days my sister’s school friends used to ask her, to quote them verbatim, why I always wear ‘a gyani buddha’ expression! ). I suffer from a peculiar seasonal sadness that has nothing to do with my real life existence. As I continue to cherish a strange joyous ecstasy with a weird deep rooted melancholia, I begin to wonder about the binaries and paradoxes that I live and think in.

    I keep protesting against comments like ‘Girls, you should always walk in groups’ questioning if ‘aklaa chalo re’ is only for boys! But, it is taking me months to make up my mind before I venture out for my solo trips and tours, something that I intend to pursue as I know this will liberate my soul. As I am constantly reaching out to friends, acquaintances (at the risk of being repetitive and hence boring) expecting them to convince me that it’s safe to travel alone, I keep struggling through my fear and paranoia.

    Another one is when I take pride in the fact that I am aging gracefully, yet every alternate month I postpone my plan of not using hair-colour to cover up my greys. Also, I just can’t suppress my thrill when people say Gosh, you don’t look your age at all! :-P 

    Increasingly, I feel uncomfortable among my age group. Most often I find their way of thinking as odd and weird. I relate to the millenial and the Gen Zee more easily, and comfortably, yet my boomer-self needs a 'print-out' of the flight ticket :-). I guess my religious/spiritual orientation could be a reason behind making me feel out-of-place most of the time. Despite being a happy Hindu, most often I get bored with rituals. My most favorite people and pillars of strength have been Nilima Khatun, Yusuf, Aayub, and Yasmin. I have enjoyed Eid along with them to my heart’s content and allowed them to touch me ‘thakurer ashon’ (the tiny temple at home) without batting an eyelid. And I have continued to be extremely uneasy among people who squirmed at the prospect of anyone from other caste or other religion touching our God. And I do not know whether I am right or wrong but I have no intention to change even a minute bit.

    Again, usually, I am the most practical one around but it takes just one bout of rainfall or a whiff of petrichor to transform me into Alice in the true sense of the character.

    As I continue to remain grateful to all who like me, love me, accept me despite my odd paradoxes; as I continue to nurture an exuberant, sensuous 25 year old mind within a not-so-young body; I keep living life, happily, among my paradoxes, (though It may be a headache for those who are close to me).  I am in no hurry to bridge those differences or gaps. I have learnt to trust them, to allow them to do their quiet, subterranean work. Meanwhile my pursuit to evolve and grow as a human being continues…



    Posted by Celestial Dreamz

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Dr Baishali Bhaumik Mitra

Dr Baishali Bhaumik Mitra
I walk through the known and unknown errors of life ... and sometimes or often when words pour on my soul ... from right and left and here and there and from everywhere, I write poems. My poems are born out of the communion of honey brown dreams and turquoise loneliness ...

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I am a conventional woman with dreamz a tad unconventional.
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My gratitude for Aquill Relle team for appreciation

My gratitude for Aquill Relle team for appreciation

Accepting with gratitude from Jingle poetry potluck

Accepting with gratitude from Jingle poetry potluck
for my poem CANCER

accepting with gratitude

accepting with gratitude

thanks Jingle

thanks Jingle

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Copy right of the posts goes to Dr Baishali Bhaumik Mitra

accepted with gratitude from poetry potluck - +weekly poet award

accepted with gratitude from poetry potluck - +weekly poet award

contest winner - appreciation from FOURTH DIMENSION BLOG

contest winner - appreciation from FOURTH DIMENSION BLOG
http://www.writerscafe.org/contests/DECEPTION--POETRY-ABOUT-DECEPTION/10845/

my gratitude

my gratitude

Gift from Jingle

Gift from Jingle

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