The oxymorons of my life ....

Why do I seek to escape when the heart desires to stay?
Why does it hurt so much when everything is so perfect?

Each time failure, like venom, fetters me firmly to the ground

I tend to fly to reach the sky and
grab the moon and search for nectar.

I conquer the battle of life with a superior detachment

yet I connect and attach to every single emotion and

accept defeat in my every day struggle!
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Deafening, ear splitting whispers of my past

create a castle of memories

And I live to die.

Yet promises of future lure me towards a horizon

making reality and dreams meet

And I die to live!
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I stand in a chaos of a market place

And think of his twinkling mischievous eyes

those create a soothing gentle silence around my heart.

Then, I am among the serene magnificent
stillness of the mountains

and perceive his vibrating resonant caressing voice 

that creates a pandemonium in my senses.
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So – called friends would vouch for such pure love

and I would observe, turning away in disgust,

their roving ugly eyes searching for my bareness

underneath all the layers of clothes .

But I would be caught in the magic of those tranquil eyes

and rush to clothe his body with my nudity in burning fire!
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I travel a full circle to mark an end to my journey

And suddenly a promising pair of eyes

Make me prepared for a new beginning!

That groovy dimpled smile make me yearn for a new future

with lots of promise and hope for a fresh birth.

Yet often in the night among the pitch dark silence

the bottle of sleeping pills on my shelf start a serpent dance

luring me, enticing me,

towards a peaceful permanent end!
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